It all started as I lay sleeping in my bed this morning. Visions of the Lord's work in my life were playing on the reel of my dreamscape. I awoke praising Him for all of the wonderful works and opportunities I had to be such a blessing in the lives of others. You see, this was the very work that my wife used as an excuse for the destruction of our marriage. She used the ministry work as a weapon over the last few years and I had come to believe the perspective she would attack with. Yet, this morning God blessed me with His presence in such a way that I saw this work was indeed not the cause but very much so the Kingdom work He himself called me to over 2 decades ago.
I went to church this morning with a new pep in my step as I felt relieved that the work I had done was not in vain, but that the Lord lead me in those things and He was very aware of my plight and doubt. As I sat in church the worship and the preaching just wasn't connecting (sorry Pastor! It was a great word though). God began to speak directly to my heart. He began to bring to my remembrance Elijah and Jezebel. As I am sure you may, I know the story well. I pulled out my cell phone and began to look at 1st Kings 18-19 but felt a little disrespectful to my Pastor while he was speaking and I was on my phone. I put the phone away but God kept bringing the story to mind.
Quick paraphrase... Elijah gets in a showdown with the priest of Baal to show whose God is the real deal. Of course God shows up and shows out and Baal does not. Elijah then slew all the priests. Ahab runs back and tells Jezebel and she vows to kill Elijah. What does Elijah do? After seeing the might works of God and slaying the priests... whom I am sure didn't get slain willingly... Elijah runs and hides! He ends up in a cave at Horeb. Now, this is where God began dealing with me.
I began to think to myself I wonder if Elijah asked himself "How did I get here?" What could cause a man who has seen so many might works of God to run and hide from this threat? All of a sudden I felt like I was in that cave with Elijah. How did I, having seen so many mighty works of God, end up in this grotto of my own? How did I get here God!?!?!? I felt God say to me, "Why do you fear Jezebel?" By then, the sermon was over and we were standing for an alter call. It felt like only seconds that this interaction between God and I was, but it had been almost an hour.
I went on about my day, bumped into my Jezebel her threats, then went home feeling yet again enclosed in my cave. Once again, my Jezebel was trying to execute what God was trying infuse. I laid on my bed and pulled my actual bible (not an electronic device) into my lap and opened 1st Kings. To my surprise, God showed up again. As I read His word in chapters 18-19 I saw something I had never caught before... As I said, I knew this story well. In the cave, God speaks to Elijah in that "still small voice" and says to him "What are you doing here, Elijah?" The Lord actually said it to him twice. Both times Elijah's rebuttal is "I loved you God, I have done your work, everyone else is gone, and now I am alone!" (my paraphrase). God tells him "Go, return on your way to the wilderness..." In that moment, in that cave, God asks Elijah..."What are you doing here?" Then puts him back on mission!
I thought maybe God would answer my "How did I get here?". Maybe Elijah did too? But God didn't! God literally said "what are you doing here?". I, along with Elijah I believe, allowed Fear and manipulation from a perceived threat cause us to forget all that God has done... The MIGHTY power He has displayed... The ABUNDANT riches he possesses... and the AMAZING grace he shows to those who love and follow Him. In that very moment, just a couple hours ago, God... through scripture, asked me... "George, What are you doing here?"
Beloved brother or sister reading this (if anyone ever really does), If you feel that fear has pushed you into hiding, that Jezebel's threats have some sort of power over you... I want to encourage you to emerge from your cavern because YOU DO NOT BELONG THERE! Emerge to the purpose God has set before you! Fear is not of the Lord and Love casts out all fear! The Jezebels of this world have no power in their threats! You are not alone! Stand! You are not a caveman but a Christ One! Remember what God has done and remind yourself and others what He can do! Fear is a threat... God is a promise!
